Astral Leauge
The Astral Leauge [sic] has been called, to some effect, a dubious cosmic cult, hyped in mystery and invented by a secret cabal in 1976 for the benefit of Leeds fan D. West, who may or may not be responsible. All rituals, initiations and hymns are strictly optional, the central dogma being that neophytes must give 50p to D. West.
Manifesting largely through anonymous fliers with a syntax all their own, The Leauge exerts a vast yet mythical influence over practically everything. Catchphrases include "Donot impinge copyright or THE ASTRAL LEAUGE WILL TAKE MEASURES."
Of the Astral Pole initiations, it is probably wisest not to speak at all – but, then, when were fans ever wise? Comments have ranged from "They're probably doing it in trendy bondage clubs all over London without realizing where it came from." to "They're doing it all wrong – they're not charging 50p!"
Performances of Astral Leauge hymns have been known to cause hardened filk-singers to reel away, shaken to their very bowels.
Connected to the Jacqueline Lichtenberg Appreciation Society.
See also: The Astral Leauge Dossier (2019 ebook).
Origins
The more prosaic origins of the Leauge came at Mancon 5, the 1976 Eastercon. Greg Pickersgill said in personal email (June 2025):
As I recall it the whole thing stems from something Brian Parker and I did at some point towards the end of Mancon 5. There was something going on that drew virtually everyone out of circulation and I found myself sitting at a table in the gloomy concrete neon-lit foyer of whatever building the programme was in. I believe this table had been used for registrations or something like that. Anyway, there's me sitting there and along comes Parker, equally at a loss. He sits down and we chat, then he asks why the table is there anyway. I explain what I think I know and suggest we sell memberships in something, anything to whoever comes along. (NB it might have been Parker who had this idea). Eventually other characters drift into our line of sight and we offer to sell them a membership, only 50p, cheap, get it now before the price goes up, never mind what it is, make sure you're in on the ground floor and so on and so forth. All the bars were shut so we had to make our own amusement. In the fullness of time Don West arrives (this is, incidentally, the first convention I actually met him at) and he is massively amused by this and joins in, no doubt hoping he can keep the money (the bars will eventually reopen). I would not care to say whether anyone was calling it the Astral Leaugue at that point, but all three found it enormously amusing and a few people actually did give us 50p. After a while more people started to arrive and things degenerated into general conversation; equally notable was an interlude when Leroy Kettle did a series of tableau vivant illustrating various fannish concepts, all aimed at Ritchie Smith who just happened to be standing close to him. This was a genuine showstopper and then the bar opened. Sometime after the convention the AL flyers started to appear, unsigned but obviously from Don West.
While the idea originated with Parker and Pickersgill it was almost immediately embraced, adopted and promoted by West. The term Astral Leauge was certainly in place by May. The undated Checkpoint 68 (the fanac.org copy is postmarked May 5, 1976) said:
The Astral Leauge is a new group hoping to promote peace and understanding should extraterrestrials land on Earth. High Priest is Don West [address]. Hangers-on include Greg Pickersgill, Brian Parker and Gray Charnock. Contact Don if you want details on how to join.
And Dave Langford reported in Twll-Ddu 2 (May 1976):
Greg Pickersgill, Don West and others now form the Astral Leauge (sic). "HANDS ACROSS THE GALAXIES! ONLY 50p! Know the mysteries of the universe through BOAKISM the secret art of seeing only one side of everything." The manic persistence with which a glazed Don West demands 50p is amazingly similar to Andy Nimmo trying to sell ESA (whatever that is) memberships for a mere £5. Would have been a better spoof if Don were to give up after a few hours, actually, but he seems immersed in his role (among other things).
Further refinements had emerged by Novacon 6 as reported by Peter Roberts in Checkpoint 76 (also November 1976):
Graham & Pat Charnock held a room party on the Saturday night in celebration of Grah's 30th birthday. It was an enjoyable gathering, enlivened by the presence of a moribund pigeon on the windowsill and by the harmonious tones of The Astral Leauge Male Voice Choir, consisting of Pete Weston, Rob Holdstock, Andrew Stephenson, Malcolm Edwards, myself, and anyone else who could see the words. The Astral Leauge went on to dominate Sunday evening when its founder, Don West (Last Of The Old Ones), initiated new members with the help of a pole: the test consisted of entangling yourself with the pole and emerging again after a series of bizarre movements. I'm glad to say I proved rubbery enough to pass, as did Roy Kettle after he'd removed his stacked heels; Greg Pickersgill discovered he wasn't the correct shape for acrobatics, and Rob Holdstock, of course, broke the damn pole.
Astral Pole
A contortion done as an initiation rite of the Astral Leauge. Chapter 4 of Dave Langford's The Transatlantic Hearing Aid offers the following description:
Take a five-foot broompole. Take several drinks. Stand. Hold the pole horizontally before you, in both hands -- hands a couple of feet apart, palms up, fingers curled round pole. The hands may optionally slide along the pole, but the grip must not alter throughout the ceremony. Lower the still-horizontal pole and step first with one foot and then with the other over the section of pole between your hands. The pole is now behind you: maintaining the grip, bring it back over your head until you are again holding it horizontally before you (though with uncomfortably twisted wrists, as you will find). This was the easy part. Now raise your right leg -- 'left' and 'right' may be exchanged throughout the following if desired -- and manoeuvre the right foot around the right-hand side of your right arm and back over the pole towards you. You should now feel less than comfortable. It only remains to duck your head under the pole and -- still without releasing your deathlike grip on it -- continue the motion so that your torso follows your head, and your whole right leg follows your right foot, through the 'hoop' defined by arms and pole. In the penultimate position you find yourself standing shakily with the still-gripped pole passing between your legs. A backwards step with the left leg over the pole returns you to square one in a glow of triumph, fulfilment and Astral Mastery. Have another drink and spend four days in traction.
See also Knurdling.
The Astral Leauge Year Book
A one-shot, 28-page fanzine published in 1977 in the UK by Graham Charnock and containing various teachings of the Astral Leauge, including amazing scientific revelations and a track-by-track description of the first Leauge music cassette, The Astral Leauge's Golden Greats (1977). The only credited contributor is Chris Priest (with "Static Gravity -- The Threat to the World", later expanded for Omni). Anonymous contributors include Graham Charnock and Chris Evans.
The full text of the Yearbook is included in The Astral Leauge Dossier (2019 ebook).
BOAK
A theological term of the Astral Leauge, it is an acronym for Bearer Of All Knowledge. However, see A. Graham Boak.
| Club | 1976—???? |
| This is a club page. Please extend it by adding information about when and where the club met, when and by whom it was founded, how long it was active, notable accomplishments, well-known members, clubzines, any conventions it ran, external links to the club's website, other club pages, etc.
When there's a floreat (Fl.), this indicates the time or times for which we have found evidence that the club existed. This is probably not going to represent the club's full lifetime, so please update it if you can! |